One other comment - cabinets
I also think that comparing the cost to make vs. buy cabinets (kitchen cabinets / built-ins) is a huge difference (outside of the time / joy of making arguments). Assuming that you can build of similar or better quality (including the finish which is probably the most challenging to replicate) if you compare the price of something like Wood-Mode cabinets I think the cost of materials to make would be much much less. I suspect at least 50%-65% less expensive from a materials perspective.
Joe