Anger, has applications to WW

[Moses Yoder]

I am studying anger as it applies to relationships. Everyone gets angry. Lets say you are ripping on the TS and a piece kicks back; a normal person reacts with some fear and then anger; fear is an emotion that drives anger. In this situation most people are angry at themselves. Lets say you just finished turning a walnut burl bowl and a friend came into the shop and saw it. He or she picks it up to look at it and accidentally drops it on the cement floor and it breaks into smithereens. Most people would get angry at their friend.

If you have found good methods of controlling anger and reacting to it, I would be very interested in hearing them.

[Myk Rian]

I don't get angry. I get even.

Seriously though, I had a kickback. Didn't get angry. Just didn't do what I did again.

[whit richardson]

Some good not new advice... a) walk away from the source if possible. distance between anger object and self. b) take 5 to 10 deep breaths (from the abdomen not chest breathing), slows down the heart rate and lowers the adrenaline and then there's c) go ahead throw something you'll feel better!

[Jim Koepke]

If you have found good methods of controlling anger and reacting to it, I would be very interested in hearing them.

+1 on this!

After almost 60 years of living in the San Francisco area we moved to a more rural area. We are now about 10 miles from the nearest traffic signal. A little further to the nearest store.

It has helped me to be much more calm.

jtk

[Kent A Bathurst]

Simply walk away from the situation. Come back later.

If the right answer is to go nuclear, then it will still be the right answer tomorrow, and you have not eliminated your options.

[Roy Harding]

There's nothing wrong with anger. It's unCONTROLLED anger that'll get you into trouble. You're right that often (usually?) fear is what causes anger - you need to understand what caused the fear, analyze it, and control it. That process can take milliseconds in some circumstances, minutes in others, and years in some. Once you've analyzed the fear (and understood how to handle it), you'll understand the anger, and then you can control it.

To react angrily is usually a mistake - especially when woodworking.

[Mel Fulks]

I find the Meditations of Marcus Aurelius helpful.

[Larry Edgerton]

No anger here. I have a block wall in my shop just for that purpose.

I cruise yard sales just so I can buy cheap tools to throw at the block wall when thing go South!

Just kidding, but it is an idea......

[Ryan Mooney]

I find the Meditations of Marcus Aurelius helpful.

More of a "book of five rings" guy myself but the principal is, I believe, similar

[Brett Luna]

If the right answer is to go nuclear, then it will still be the right answer tomorrow, and you have not eliminated your options.

"I say we take off and nuke the entire site from orbit. It's the only way to be sure."

More seriously, I don't often get too angry in the shop. When I do, swearing a blue streak for a minute usually relieves dangerous pressure levels sufficiently.

[DOUG ANGEL]

Stop what you are doing, take several deep breaths, calm down. If that doesn't work, take a walk for at least 10 minuets. That always calms me down enough to be rational. Rational people can solve problems either personal or technical. If you can't get results after all this, NUKE 'EM.

[Dave Zellers]

Anger is usually an indulgence. We always have at least 2 choices, walk away/shrug it off, or get angry. There are certainly times when getting angry serves a useful purpose, but they are few and far between.

[Shawn Pixley]

I used to have an anger problem. Between a few traumatic events and some concious work on my part, I don't usully get too angry over things / material objects. I can still get angry when something or someone threatens those who I consider my family (biologic and those who we "adopt").

More practically, if a friend dropped one of my turnings on the floor, I am sure that they would be equally unhappy. I feel confident they would at a minimum offer to get me a new piece of burl. Those that wouldn't do that, wouldn't be my friends and thusly not in my shop.

In he orginal situation described, I'd like to think that I would be temporarily unhappy, and then I would move on. I have chosen the way I want to live my life. Being angry about things, is not in that construct. Life is too short to live angry over small things all the time. Others seem surprised at my current zen demeanor.

[Andrew Hughes]

I was in a meeting once and guy shared the when he got pissed off angry he file the point off of a nail or cut some metal with a hack saw.I thought that was a interesting outlet.
Myself I just stuff my feeling.Thats what I do since I can remember according to my inventorys I'm also a passive aggressive.Aj

[Justin Ludwig]

I read "A New Earth" by Eckhart Tolle in 2007 when I went through a divorce. The book "found" me, as it was sitting on my Mom's coffee table as part of her "Oprah book club" stack. It's full of a bunch of hippie philosophical mumbo jumbo "live and let live" type of advice. There are some great adages and metaphors in it that I still reference today. It helps with anger management. It may sound like I'm making fun at the book, but it was a tremendous help.

My old Navy roommate and best friend went through a very tough divorce in 2010 because his kids were moving to Norway as a result. I referred the book to him and he said it helped him as well. My wife read it and said, "Meh", with a shoulder shrug.

Good luck.

I'll add this. I don't let things stew. If somethings bothers me, I deal with it ASAP (both personally and professionally). I don't like having 1-sided conversations in my head where I always win. It's detrimental to do that. Address the issue, open-minded, with the person you have problems.