A good deal on Missouri Prairie Chickens-LOML humor

[mark page]

I recently received this months Missouri Conservationist magazine and there was a great article on Missouri prairie chickens. LOML was in the tub soakin' her bones and I was reading the article in the bedroom. I kindly asked her if she wanted to read the magazine before I discarded it. She stated that she might want to browse through it. I then informed her that there was a great deal on Missouri prairie chickens in it. She then asked if I had lost my ever lovin ****** mind. I said NO and that there is a great deal on prairie chickens and there is only like 500 of them left in the state. She then asked again if I had lost my ever lovin ****** mind. This caught me off guard and I asked her what crawled up her behind. She stated that we ain't buying no **** prairie chickens no matter what kind of deal it is. I guess I should have stated that it was a great deal of information on prairie chickens!!! I was laughing till tears ran down my face!!! She then informed me that when I say the word DEAL, it usually means a good buy on a car, woodworking equipment, honey can I buy this, etc. I stated that we do have a little extra room in the basement!!!

[Joe Chritz]

That is funny, but just so you know chickens do very well in the basement. I just recently went to a house that had a dozen or so living in the basement.

I wonder if they were prairie chickens? Would they cease being prairie chickens and become basement or cellar chickens once relocated?

Joe

I recently received this months Missouri Conservationist magazine and there was a great article on Missouri prairie chickens. LOML was in the tub soakin' her bones and I was reading the article in the bedroom. I kindly asked her if she wanted to read the magazine before I discarded it. She stated that she might want to browse through it. I then informed her that there was a great deal on Missouri prairie chickens in it. She then asked if I had lost my ever lovin ****** mind. I said NO and that there is a great deal on prairie chickens and there is only like 500 of them left in the state. She then asked again if I had lost my ever lovin ****** mind. This caught me off guard and I asked her what crawled up her behind. She stated that we ain't buying no **** prairie chickens no matter what kind of deal it is. I guess I should have stated that it was a great deal of information on prairie chickens!!! I was laughing till tears ran down my face!!! She then informed me that when I say the word DEAL, it usually means a good buy on a car, woodworking equipment, honey can I buy this, etc. I stated that we do have a little extra room in the basement!!!

[mark page]

I'm still laughing at this one. I guess she understood me to say that with only 500 left in the state, we better start buying while the buying is still good. lol.
Reading the article, the prairie chicken is almost extinct in MO. They are a partridge sized bird and have been illegal to hunt since 1907. They resemble what I think would be a grouse. A covey needs at least 4 square miles of prairie to effectively survive on. (No wonder their almost extinct here). From what I read is Northern Texas is about the only place they have left to proliferate in. Texans can probably chime in more about these birds than I can.

[Belinda Barfield]

Mark, thanks for the laugh this morning! That's a good one.

Joe, yes, I believe you could classify those chickens as basement chickens!

[Greg Cole]

Joe,
I've had a few cellar dwellars in my home, but they were one of the 2 elder step daughters....
A good friend of mine lived in an apartment next to a farm back when I lived in Vermont & the damn chickens were always visiting his place, trying to get in the house, your car or truck... not too mention the miserable barn cats on the prowl for the chickens (good beer drinking amusement though ).

Greg

[jeremy levine]

My sister-in-law had just had a baby and the nurse said I would like to set some time aside to talk about "shaken baby syndrome". But what my sister-n-law heard was "chicken baby syndrome" which sounded really bad to her.

[Rick Potter]

Forgive me, but I don't get to tell this story very often. As a fireman, I worked for a while in East Los Angeles. Since most people in Eastlos speak only spanish, the first thing we usually did on arrival at an incident was to ask around to see if anyone could speak english and interperet for us.

Well, we went out on a medical call of a woman down, found her laying on the sidewalk surrounded by a couple dozen people. We found our interpreter and had him ask her what was wrong. He asked her , then recounted to us .... "Chicken breath". Not being properly trained on any chicken breath illnesses, we asked him to ask her again. The reply again..."Chicken breath".

The crowd is getting restless, we were giving her O2 for a bit of labored breathing while waiting for some more information. We tried one more time. He tried one more time......"Chicken breath"...holding his hands around his neck he tried to demonstrate..."Chicken breath...you know....chi can breath".



(she can't breathe)