SWMBO & Tools?

[Kevin Gerstenecker]

Everytime I have the need, (or desire) to purchase additional Woodworking Tools, I encounter absolutely NO resistance from the LOML. We have been married 18 years, and it has always been this way. Am I in the Minority here? She realizes that my veins run rich with sawdust, but no matter what the request, she never has a problem with it. I have many friends who have great wives, but I am always hearing the stories of how they got chewed for buying this or that. I realize that I am fortunate to have such an understanding and unselfish mate, but I was just wondering how much resistance, or lack thereof, others encounter when the subject of tool purchase arise. To SWMBO, it doesn't matter if it is a $10 item, or a $1000 item, her response it always the same. Of course, I don't take unfair advantage of the situation, but I have just about anything my heart desires in my Shop. Of course, SWMBO loves the things I build for our home. I was just curious to see the responses of my fellow "Creek Waders" on this subject. I though it may provoke some interesting conversation?

[Jim Baker]

Kevin,

This is a very interesting subject. I too think it will provoke some interesting discussion and a wide variety of responses.

When we got married, we agreed not to purchase anything of significant value without discussing it and agreeing on it first. This has eliminated any possibility of "getting chewed out" for buying tools, or anything else for that matter.

Believe it or not, we buy most of our tools together. We both work in our shop and she uses the tools right along with me. Of course, like you mentioned, she likes the things we make for our home so that helps justify the cost of most of our tools for both of us.

[jack duren]

ive been a cabinet maker since high school(ok, 3 months first as a brick layer). first wife had no problems. second wife (14yrs) gave me da evil eye for eleven of em. but over the last three years she has absolutely no problem at all with my tool purchases. even looks at the magazines to see what im a gonna buy. she doesnt have a clue to what shes lookin at in the catalog but approves of my purchase and say its a good deal .

but then again in the last 3 years she has seen the profitable rewards from the jobs i do for customers. first 11 yrs she saw it as a hobby and the last 3 yrs a profitable business. my how times have changed ......jack

[Jerry P. Doan]

The wonderful LOML and I will soon celebrate our 33rd anniversary. She has never been interested in tools and I have never been interested in sewing machines, although we have admired the work the other has produced with these machines. Neither one of us has ever scolded the other regarding a purchase, regardless of the cost. There hasn't been a need to. She chose to work outside the home once the youngest child started school. First as an RN and eventually as a CNO. During this time our incomes were similar, and any reason I could give for buying a new tool, she could use similar reasoning to purchase something she wanted. And both of us purchased a lot of things. Sometimes she seemed happy I wanted to make a major purchase, because she was planning one herself. Somehow, we both managed enough financial restraint to stay out of troulble.

What's good for the gander is good for the goose!

[Bruce Page]

Thankfully, my wife has always been supportive of my tool purchases. I have a “mad money” account that gets deposited to with each paycheck and I use these funds for most of my tools.

My wife has recently taken up woodcarving but is struggling with the tool sharpening side of it. Last weekend she told me that she wants a Tormek Super Grind for her birthday!

At least she has good taste.

[Jim Young]

I'm not so fortunate. I think $10 to $15 is the limit before I have some explaining to do. My real need, or rationalization, for the tool usually determines if I get it or not. Bonus check time is usually my best time to buy big items.

[Charles McKinley]

My wife is GREAT! I'm a stay at home dad looking at building rustic furniture and have just purchased a Powermatic 66 (Ebay)and a 16" Crescent jointer (woodweb classifieds). She supports my wanting to start a business that I can do after she gets home and may be able to help with. We feel very lucky that one of us can stay at home with our two daughters: 19 months and 3 months.

I have been gathering tools since I was 12 but still need some big ticket items. It will be awhile until we can afford another major purchase but we discuss it and if the money is there I can buy it.

We should all be so lucky!

[Ron Taylor]

because if I happen to mention a tool that I want, she is likely to go buy it for me. I have ended up having to "love" a tool that I wouldn't have bought before I'd done enough research to know whether or not that particular make, model, color, etc. was what I REALLY wanted.

My problem doesn't apply just to woodworking tools either. I'm also into amateur radio, motorcycles, and several other pasttimes. In 27 great years, she has never complained about a single expenditure for my toys. And, she has bought many of them.

LMOL & Tools!!!!

[Jim Izat]

My lovely wife is the same way. In fact sometimes I wish she would tell me no! I have to admit, the fact that I know she'll say yes causes me to be very careful about what I do spend money on. She is a very smart lady......

Jim Izat

[Lee Schierer]

My wife pretty much lets me get the tools I want. However, we discuss the purchase ahead of time. I don't ask for every new tool that comes along and I tell her in advance what it is going to do that I can't do now.

There is not a single tool that I have covertly added to my collection. Every tool gets used a reasonable amount or did on the job it was purchased for.

At Christmas and birthday time I get asked what I would like and some tools get put on the list.

I thnk the key to successful tool buying cooperation and being serious when you say you need a tool and avoiding "wanting a tool". A little trust goes a long long ways.

Oh yeah, 33 years and counting.

[Dave Anderson NH]

Sue and I both work, there are no kids at home any more, and our tastes are generally pretty simple. The agreement is essentially that she doesn't ask me what I spend on tools and I don't ask what she spends on golf. As a matter of courtesy we DO advise the other and discuss any purchase of $1000 or over before proceeding. My particular problem is that the restraints are usually self imposed ones. I have trouble parting with a buck and justifying something in my own mind. Last year I was grumbling about having to do a lot of moritses and how lousy the attachment for my drill press was. Sue stopped me and said to shut up and just go buy the thing. I told her the one I wanted was the PM 719A and it was $800. She said"So?" I went to Woodcraft, wrestled with myself, and ended up coming home with the JET. I couldn't justify spending the extra $500+ for a machine I only use occasionally. Remember folks, I'm a Neanderthal and still do most of my mortises by hand. It's just a typical Yankee guilt trip. You could say I'm my own worst enemy when it comes to tool purchases.

[Ted Shrader]

Couple of weeks ago, lying in bed, out of the blue she says, "You need a mortiser." "Huh?" was my exceptionally brilliant response. Then she proceeded to justify why I needed a mortiser and said I was to do the research and let her know which one I wanted. Good thing I was already laying down, otherwise I would have fallen down.

Ordinarily she is very supportive of the tools I pruchase. During the selection process, she listens to the good/bad qualities of each and asks very good questions.

This is the first tool purchase she has instigated. I'm still kind of suspicious. Instead of asking for a piece of furniture and me responding with the additional tool I need to build it, she might be playing a bit of chess and setting me up for more than one piece of furniture. And, in the process, eliminating my tool buying strategy. I wonder if she has this figured out?

I guess I am very lucky!

Ted

[Keith Hall]

It looks like most who have posted on this subject are very blessed with outstanding wives who are willing to indulge their husband's woodworking wants and needs. I, too, am very lucky in this respect. First the cabinet saw, then the jointer and bandsaw for Christmas. Last week when she was in the shop, she kept looking all over the place, then finally asked, "where are the kitchen cabinets you promised to build for me?" Since the weather is warming up, I guess I had better get started. Its been 45 years and counting. Keith

[Bruce Page]

Originally posted by Keith Hall
she kept looking all over the place, then finally asked, "where are the kitchen cabinets you promised to build for me?" Since the weather is warming up, I guess I had better get started. Its been 45 years and counting. Keith

Ha! That was my excuse 3 years ago when I bought my Unisaw. I don't think my grace period will last as long.

[Terry Hatfield]

I have been married 18 years also!! Happily I might add.

Cheryl has never said no to anyting I wanted. I don't take advantage of that fact....ok sometimes I do.....but not too often.

Wonderful wives are hard to come by. Woodworking is just the last of several addictions....er...hobbies I have had. I have been able to do whatever I could afford. Ain't it wonderful!!!!

Terry